Harper's Birth Story

{{{{{I wrote this a few weeks after Harper was born and just never posted it.  I figure on the eve of her 1st birthday is a good time to post it.}}}}}

I always wanted to write up Brady's birth story but never got around to it.  So of course this time around I vowed to do so and am just now getting to it.  I have the worst memory and parts of this day are already no longer part of my memory so I am going to have to try hard to remember.  If you don't want to read the words uterus, vomit, dry heaving, barf bag, or placenta just skip this post.  I promise not to be too graphic.

I will start by saying the day of my scheduled c-section with Brady I had no idea what would happen so I wasn't too nervous.  I just showed up to the hospital and 2 hours later was being wheeled in to surgery.  Jim came in the room all dressed up in a paper outfit and they got to work.  I remember the only thing I was worried about was feeling something so when she told me she was already into my uterus I relaxed because I didn't feel one thing.  I felt like it took forever but spent the time making jokes and talking to Jim.  The nurse said to me "get ready, this is going to be anti-climactic" and out popped a giant headed baby.  Lots of comments of how big his head was and they whisked him over to the warmer to get to work on him.  He was crying and peeing all over which got lots of laughs.  I remember turning my head to watch and seeing Jim crying.  It was so perfect.  Then my blood pressure bottomed out and I started violently barfing all over myself.  Seriously, it was like a volcano that wouldn't stop erupting.  The nurse held a tiny little tray next to my head to catch it but most of it landed on my face and hair.  Since I was so sick they took Jim and Brady out of the room and finished stitching me up.  I was totally out of it and don't remember much.  Once back in recovery I couldn't hold Brady for a long time because I couldn't feel my arms and was too weak.  I eventually started feeling better, held him, and totally fell in love.  I swore while I was pregnant I would never do this again and it took me about an hour to decide I would in fact do it again because the baby at the end was one hell of a trophy.

So with that being said my actual c-section sucked and it made me very nervous this time around.  I cried the whole day before, the whole night, and the whole drive to the hospital.  I was deathly afraid of the same thing happening and not being able to enjoy the excitement of her birth.  The insane amount of guilt I felt for ruining Brady's life didn't help matters much either but that's a whole other story.

We show up to the hospital 2 hours prior and I get in my gown and the nurse gets to work.  She was working kinda slow and the Dr. was nervous she wouldn't be ready on time.  The anesthesiologist showed up to start on my epidural.  That wasn't nearly as painful as I remembered and I was feeling pretty optimistic at this point.  Another nurse popped in and said there was a woman in labor and they needed an epidural right away for her.  The anesthesiologist promised to come right back and finish me up. He told the nurse to make sure she had a shot in case my blood pressure drops out.  The nurse goes on to explain that occasionally people can get sick right after getting the epidural inserted but its so rare so no need to worry.  Well no longer than 5 seconds later I feel as if I am going to die.  It happened to me, great.  I was so close to passing out but felt like I was going to be sick so I asked for a barf bag.  Jim gets one which looks like a tube sock with a plastic ring opening.  As I am going in and out of consciousness the nurse gives me that shot (which I am totally blanking on the name right now something like epinephrine or ephedrine) and tells me I will be ok very soon.  I am dry heaving at this point and Jim is holding the barf tube over my face.  Not very helpful if I puke since if would have all fallen back on my face.  A few minutes later my blood pressure is back up and the room is full of hospital staff.  Whew, all this and I haven't even gone into surgery yet.

So suffice to say at this point I am a freaking out and totally scared out of my mind.  I want this over with asap.  They get me totally ready and wheel me into the OR.  I am strapped down to the table completely flat on my back.  If you recall my belly was as large as a VW bug so this is making me feel like I am suffocating.  I am alone because Jim isn't allowed in yet and no one is helping me.  So it gets worse.  I start thrashing around trying to breath and not puke on myself.  And the cursing starts.  And its bad.  Real bad.  I am cursing to just get this baby out NOW.  I am pretty sure no one was even listening to me.  In the meantime they are getting ready but the NICU staff is no where to be found and they can't start until they show up.  WTF!!  "Oh, Mrs. Lasher can a student come in and watch the surgery?"  I don't give a shit who comes in just take this baby out!  They show up, do their important checklist stuff, and Jim comes in.  I am a mess at this point.  Prior to going into the room I told him his only job was to talk to me so he had plenty of time to come up with something to talk about.  And of course he had come up with nothing to take my mind off it so I was breathing deep and cursing.

I remember they started late, 9:36, and at 9:54 they told Jim to get ready because here she comes.  He got this picture and I am so glad that when I look at this I forget for a second how God awful the previous 2 hours were.  Right before they pull her out they were talking about the size of her cheeks.  I ask if she is in fact a girl (since I was so not convinced I was carrying a girl fetus) and they say she isn't even out yet, they were just admiring her cheeks.

They bring her over to the warmer thing and at this point I feel like a 2,485lb. weight has been lifted off my chest and can finally breath (and stop cursing).  I turn my head to watch all the festivities and forget completely my insides are showing.  They just kept talking about how big she was.  They lay her on the scale and Jim yells "Oh my God, she is almost 12lbs."  What???  The nurse laughs at him and points out the 8 on the scale.  She was 8lbs. 11.6 ounces, he only saw the 11.6 part.  But yes, she was big.  At this point I start feeling something painful on my right side.  I ask the Dr. (who has the largest hands I have ever seen) if he was leaning on something because it hurt.  He informed me that it was the side he had my uterus out on.  OK, seriously?  My uterus is out of my body right now?  Yep!  Wow, didn't know that.  They finish up and send Jim and Harper out of the room.  I am able to go to them in recovery.

Because of the blood pressure dropping earlier they wouldn't let me sit up.  Not one inch so I was laying completely flat on my back while a nurse attempts to show me how to breastfeed (yes, I tried this time around but it wasn't for me).  Learning to breastfeed while you are flat on your back and can't lift your arms isn't really going to help you learn.  Eventually I convinced the nurse to let me sit up a bit and I think she lifted my bed like 1cm.  

I had asked during my surgery to see my placenta.  So the nurse brings it in to give me a whole science class lesson.  I thought Jim was going to pass out or throw up so suffice to say he didn't watch. I thought it was fascinating and am really glad I got a nurse who was equally as interested in it as I was. 

The rest was just typical stuff.  I was able to get out of the bed and walk that night and 2 days later I was able to shower.  This time around it was so much easier and I was in hardly any pain.  Minus the whole blood pressure bottoming out and feeling like I was suffocating on the operating table it was great.

And here is our trophy... pretty cute, huh?

One year ago today

We made the big announcement....  this is the exact post from exactly one year ago today.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Brady finds out the big news

So tonight we sat Brady down to tell him some news.  He was hopeful, maybe he thought we were getting him a pony.

"What's this guys?"


"A baby??  No thank you!"


"I don't want to be a big brother!!"


"Oh no, I won't be number 1 anymore!!"


"I want to be the favorite!!"


"We can't give it back???  NOOOOOO!!!"


Jim and I are excited to announce that we are expecting another big headed Lasher baby on 10-10-10.  Someone in this house obviously isn't too thrilled.



My, my, my how things have changed in one year. Here she is now. Fat, happy, and sunbathing during breakfast.

37 Weeks

You didn't think I was actually going to tell you..... ha!!  But in all seriousness we still don't have a name set in stone.  As of last week I thought I had decided but now I am not so sure.  With Brady we had the name picked right after the big ultrasound, probably around 22-24 weeks.  We referred to him as that name throughout the rest of the pregnancy.  It was great and really helped me feel connected.  This time I am still calling her the baby, or she, or even sometimes just the fetus because I am still not 100% convinced she is a she.  I can't make the decision for the life of me and here is why.  Jim picked Brady's name.  I had veto power and I am sure I used it for a few and Brady was one I was ok with.  It ended up growing on me over the next few weeks and by the time he got here he was a Brady for sure.  This time its my choice, so if after she is born I end up not loving the name its my fault and I won't be able to blame Jim (which I love to do in case you don't know me).  So hopefully soon I make the final decision or else I might make myself crazy.

(NOTE:  I wrote this post last night but never hit post until this morning, oops)
We have been counting down the days, literally, since I think 49 days.  Well we are down to 15 days and whenever we say it out loud we end up saying "oh shit, what were we thinking" or "oh crap, we aren't ready."  We have been killing ourselves every night and weekend and yet still there seems to be a ton to do.  I am thinking that we must be on the home stretch since the fridge to do list is almost empty, but that doesn't mean I won't wake up tomorrow with a new list.  I have started the cleaning part of the nesting, which does nothing good for my back, but at least the back of my bedroom doors are clean, right??

Fill in the blanks time:

At 37 weeks________________________________.
- bath towels are no longer one size fits all.  I "tried on" bath towels tonight at Target and must have looked insane.  None fit so I am stuck with my mini towels for the next 2 weeks. 
-putting on sneakers is not easy and should not be done twice in one day.  So if you want to wear sneakers be sure you are going to be happy with the first pair you struggle to get on.  I did not heed this advice the other day when I decided the first pair didn't fit and had to put on a second pair.  Not fun, I will stick with flip flops and Uggs until further notice.
-ironing is not safe.  I have burned my belly more times than I can count with my crafting for her room.  I think I might be done ironing tomorrow so all is good.
-people will say "holy shit" when they see how pregnant you look now after not seeing you for a while.  Case in point our waitress at the diner in town said that when I walked in the other night.  Apparently she didn't notice I was pregnant the last few times we went.  I told her I hid the pregnancy until just now.
-your toddler will most likely bump into your belly no fewer than 6317 times in a day.  Luckily he is cute.  He will also play hide and seek with it because he knows you find it insanely adorable.
-no clothes will fit and you will be forced to do laundry more often so those last 3 tank tops that you just bought in 2 sizes bigger to cover the bottom of your giant bump can be worn on a constant rotation.  Otherwise people would vomit, so I am saving humanity here from barfing on their feet.
-People will stare at you while you breath deep and lean again the aisle in Target while eating a Ring Ding.  Never go to Target hungry.  I stocked on only the essentials tonight.... Doritos (which we NEVER have in the house), candy corn, candy corn pumpkins, cereal, ring dings, mascara, and a new front door mat.  The check out girl just chuckled.
-you should seriously considering washing an article of clothing for this new baby you will be bringing home.  I have yet to wash 1 item of clothing and only tonight did I wash the cover for the carseat.  Baby steps I guess.  And subconsciously I don't think its a girl so I may not wash anything pink until I bring her home from the hospital, just to be sure.
-rolling over in bed involves a spotter, an act of God, and incredible momentum.  Its not pretty.
-your husband is lying to you when he tells you that you look good.  Mine doesn't lie, he informed me yesterday my stomach was purple.  No dear, those are my stretch marks but thanks for noticing.  He also informed me last week while sitting at Panera that I didn't even look pregnant from where he was sitting, but if I stood up not so much.  Apparently my face and chest aren't pregnant but the rest of me is.
-you will seriously consider wearing a diaper to bed just to save yourself the hassle of getting out of bed and to the toilet 4 times in a night.
-you will start to remember actually having your last baby and start to get nervous.  I am just hoping when I come out of surgery this time I am not covered in barf.  I was not a pretty sight, and sadly it was scheduled so I was even showered with my hair done.
-your husband will tell you that you look like you have 2 different length legs since you will now waddle so much.  And he will think he is beyond hysterical with that one.  You will not find it so amusing.
-you will no longer be able to press the saved setting on your power seat in the car since what may have been comfortable and safe yesterday might likely not be today.  I am pretty much tippy toe touching the gas pedal while laying down almost flat. 
-you will now have an insane amount of guilt for your toddler because he is losing his only child status.  I am still mourning the loss of my only child status and my brother Tom is going to be 22 next month.
-and you are like me you will be optimistic that you won't get nearly as many cavities as last pregnancy (somewhere in the ballpark of 10-12, I can't remember, and that's just during the last 7 months of the pregnancy, yikes) but your optimism will dwindle when you find an actual hole in the front of your tooth visible to the naked eye.  Why do my fetuses ruin my teeth? My teeth are one thing about me that I am actually happy about, ugh!

I could go on all day but I won't.  As scared and nervous as we are, we are equally as excited for the impending arrival.  I complained throughout my whole pregnancy with Brady but just don't have a blog post to prove it, although I wish I did blog then so I could read back on what was going on.  But I will say he was probably only 6 hours old and I was saying how pregnancy wasn't THAT bad and I would totally do it again.  Hopefully I feel the same way this time.

EDIT:  Jim would like it noted that he is not that much of a jerk.  While he admits to saying those things, he does find me attractive and thinks I look great.  OK babe, thanks!  But I still don't believe him ;)